zzz

My bad luck came back. I was in so deep crap that I could not even successfully wrote a note on the phone.

Sum up from my yesterday fail-to-post note: Girls are all mean.

So, don't ask why I have few girl friends and a lot of boy friends. 

It had been tremendously long time since I was treated that way and felt that upset. It was like nightmares came true. Irony that I always had that kind of nightmare and woke up shivering but felt lucky because I survived. Nevertheless I was not totally stuck now. Imagine everyday you are surrounded and buried and suffocated by bully, ill-treatment, malicious tongues of pretty and gentle girls, and you have no way to run away because you want to be educated. You have to go to school, in another word.

I was not stuck now. For sure. I had places to run away and hide.

I still cried. A lot. I had not grown up regardless of my age. This was more disastrous. I was very disappointed of myself.